Are you in a dead end relationship? Can it be revived, or is it time to walk away?
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Are You Living in a Dead Relationship?
No one wants to be in a dead relationship. But how do you know when it’s truly dead or just needs to be revived? Or is it time to walk away?
Relationships are living, breathing things. Just as each individual in the relationship has a personality, so does the relationship. It has a life and it grows and matures with time.
And like anything with a life, a relationship can die. While you might be picturing a breakup, that’s not what I’m referring to. I’m talking about a dead relationship: one that still exists, in that the two people are still in it, yet it has no future and no life left in it. A dead end relationship.
Sometimes our relationship just falls into a rut, and it can be difficult to tell the difference between a rut and a dead relationship.
But if it’s truly a dead relationship, then why haven’t you walked away?
Clinging on?
This is why you’re clinging to a relationship that’s dead in the water.
Just because we know our relationships are failing does not mean we always have the power to extract ourselves from them. Some of us cling to dying relationships for months and years beyond their expiration date, and we do this for a number of reasons that keep us stuck and unhappy.
It’s about fear. You’re afraid that you might not find someone else and that you’ll be lonely forever. It’s that fear that stops you from walking away. This fear is actually hindering your own personal growth.
This fear can include a fear of being alone, fear of doing the wrong thing, fear of hurting others, fear of hurting yourself financially, and even fear of change in general. If you’re in an especially toxic relationship (or even one with children involved) you can also find yourself dealing with fear of retribution: both intended and unintended.
Sometimes we just think it’s too much hard work to walk away and find someone else. We’ve invested so much time and energy in this relationship, can we really just end it here? Do we really want to go through all of that hard work all over again? What if that new relationship doesn’t work out either.
So with thoughts like this, many times we just cling on to dead end relationships, because we think it’s better to stay in something we know rather than embark on the unknown.
It’s time to let go
Letting go of a dead relationship is never an easy or an enjoyable process. No matter how peaceful our resolutions might be, the ending of a relationship is ultimately a death in our lives and one which must be processed carefully. Holding on to a dead partnership isn’t noble. It’s toxic to who we are, and it prevents us from getting where we need to be. If you’re in a relationship that brings you nothing but misery, it might be time to dig deep and let go. It’s time to walk away.
I don’t understand why people do this. If I’m with somebody and I claim that I want to stay in the relationship, then I want it to be beautiful. He gotta be responsive to my efforts to make him feel loved, make him smile, make him get out of his own head, and enjoy the one short life we’ve been given. Happiness is a choice. If he’s in a dark place in life then he better communicate that with me so that I can give him whatever is needed for him to get through it. Whether that’s space, time, or more unrequited love. I’ll be understanding. But, if things don’t change over time I’m not about to stick around. I’d rather spend all that energy making my own self happy and I’m not about to let him kill my vibe. I love him but I love me more and I want to enjoy life! It’s that simple lol